REASSIGNMENT

When I was young

I dreamt  I could fly

Headfirst down the staircase

Just didn't know why

Maybe I'm dodo

Reincarnate.

Or Gipsy Moth pilot

Opened too late

By breakfast time it all seemed fine

I had my arms not wings

My human lips and human hips

My human voice that sings

I'm glad to be, comfortably me

Don't hanker a lot for something i'm not

I met an old bloke who told me a joke

Of a guy who was changed to a toad

Saw nothin wrong in

Appeasing the longing

To try the amphibious mode

I wanna be, something more free

Maybe grow feathers

That work in all weathers

Found a good surgeon

In need of some cash.

Said “That's a challenge

I'll give it a bash.

Cut and I'll paste bits

Then, strictly speaking,

Need to rewire you

Sub-nano tweaking”.

Beaks, wings and feathers

Part of the deal.

Fancied some extras

To make it more real.

Chose from the menu

A hole to lay eggs,

Ospreyesque talons

Attached to the legs.

I'm full of glee, at the thought of a me

Fly so high, up to the sky

Twiddly dee, twiddly dee

Yipeedeedee, Yipeedeedee

Twiddly dee, shiny new me

So happy, that is me

After the first phase

I woke with a fright

Conk on my face

Horrible sight.

Where I had teeth

Now bloody great gaps

Had no control of the

Pecks or the flaps.

Met a strange creature

Half man half bee

Pesticide residue casualty.

A few other folk

Gone top of the list

Heart ops and transplants

Cannot be missed.

Can't let you bedlock

They'll move you down stairs

Vertical stacking

Is one of their flairs.

Trolley queue backing

Vertical stacking

Trolley queue backing

Vertical stacking

Down on the wards

No hospital beds

Just ivy clad branches

To perch on instead.

The doc she ain't said how

How it works in my head

Or how I get flying

With bones made of lead.

No therapy sessions

To cope with the trauma

Of playing guitar as

Fingerless fauna.

No avian hormones

To help me digest

That crazy new food

I bring back to the nest.

I wanna be, how I used to be

Feeling myself just like the old me.

I wonder, who’s got my nut sack

Who’s got my arms, who's got my back.

When you hear a tooth fairy

Be a little more wary.

I wanna be, something like me

Something like me, something not me.

                             

© MOTH 2017

So we already have the option of gender reassignment.

Here’s a thought for those fauna-fluid folk fighting for the right to get species reassignment surgery at the local hospital.

LIT NOTES FOR THE PEDANTIC

The index events for traumatic, recurring dreams are sometimes hard to identify. Where no logical explanation exists some say they are the remnant of the final moments of your previous life.

A Gipsy Moth was a small airplane from the early C20. You’d need to be in the correct variant to get out of the thing easily with a parachute. You’d also need to be at sufficient altitude or the chute would open too late or not at all.

A conk is a nose that is beak-like or has been changed to a beak.

“Bones made of lead” isn’t literal but refers to the relative density between human bones and lightweight avian bones. You’d need to change the bones as well or make other power/weight ratio savings in order to get airborne.

Digestive enzymes are triggered by hormones that need to be chosen correctly.

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